CALM STARTS HERE
Virtual Psychotherapy and Counselling
for Adults and Couples in Ontario and Newfoundland
Frequently Asked Questions - Couples & Relationship Therapy
What if my partner does not want to come to therapy?
You can still come on your own. Individual therapy can help you understand patterns in the relationship, regulate your nervous system, set boundaries, and change how you respond, even if your partner is not ready to join. Changing one part of a system often shifts the whole system. You do not need your partner’s participation to begin healing.
What if we argue all the time, is couples therapy helpful?
Yes. Frequent conflict often signals underlying disconnection, not failure. Couples therapy helps you slow conversations down, understand what is happening beneath the arguments, and learn ways to repair that do not escalate or shut down. Many couples tell me therapy helps them fight less, feel calmer, and recover faster, even when disagreements still happen.
How is the Gottman Method used in sessions?
I integrate Gottman-based tools such as:
communication exercises
repair and reconnection practices
identifying “Four Horsemen” conflict patterns
mapping underlying emotions beneath arguments
building rituals of connection and intimacy
These strategies are always adapted to your pace, your personalities, and your goals, never “cookie cutter.”
What is the Gottman Method?
The Gottman Method is an evidence-based couples therapy approach developed from decades of relationship research. It focuses on:
strengthening friendship and emotional connection
reducing conflict that feels unmanageable
building skills for repair after ruptures
increasing appreciation and positive interactions
addressing lingering resentments gently and directly
It is structured, practical, and focused on helping you build a relationship that actually feels better in daily life.
Is couples therapy effective online?
Yes! Online therapy improves accessibility for those with busy schedules, health concerns, childcare needs, weather, or geographic distance. I offer online therapy for adults and couples located in Ontario, Newfoundland, and British Columbia.
What is couples / relationship therapy and how can it help our relationship?
Couples therapy offers a supportive space to understand repeating patterns, improve communication, and strengthen emotional and physical connection. Many couples come because they are arguing, feeling distant, repairing betrayal, or simply wanting to feel close again. Therapy can help you move from blame and defensiveness toward understanding, teamwork, and safety.
What if we argue all the time - is couples therapy still helpful?
Yes. Frequent conflict often signals underlying disconnection, not failure. Couples therapy helps you slow conversations down, understand what is happening beneath the arguments, and learn ways to repair that do not escalate or shut down. Many couples tell me therapy helps them fight less, feel calmer, and recover faster, even when disagreements still happen.
Can couples therapy help if one of us wants to separate?
Therapy can support you at any stage: staying together, deciding, or consciously uncoupling. There is no pressure to reach a specific outcome. My role is to help both partners feel heard, reduce blame, and support clarity so you are not navigating this alone. Sometimes therapy strengthens the relationship; sometimes it provides care and structure during endings. Both are valid.
What issues do you specialize in for couples therapy?
I support couples experiencing:
frequent conflict or communication breakdown
feeling like “roommates instead of partners”
low desire or mismatched desire
betrayal, infidelity, or ruptured trust
stress after life transitions (babies, illness, loss, work changes)
pressure, resentment, or feeling unseen
difficulty expressing emotions
navigating neurodiversity or ADHD in relationships
My approach supports both partners feeling heard, respected, and understood rather than blamed.
Can couples therapy help after infidelity or betrayal?
Yes. Healing after betrayal is complex but possible. Therapy provides a structured space to process emotions, rebuild safety, and understand what happened without minimizing pain. We move gently, there is no pressure toward staying or leaving, only clarity, honesty, and care.
Is couples therapy only for relationships in crisis?
No. Many couples come to therapy because they want to prevent crisis. Therapy can support premarital preparation, life transitions, new parents adjusting, or couples who simply want to strengthen closeness and communication.
