CALM STARTS HERE
Virtual Psychotherapy and Counselling
for Adults and Couples
in Ontario and Newfoundland
Frequently Asked Questions - Sex Therapy
Where do you offer sex therapy?
I offer online therapy to adults and couples located in Ontario, Newfoundland, and British Columbia. Sessions are provided virtually, so you can engage in therapy in the comfort of your own home, something that is a priority for those seeking sex therapy.
Is sex therapy medical or invasive?
No. Sex therapy is talk therapy only. There are no demonstrations or sexual activities in session. We focus on:
emotions
beliefs
nervous system responses
relationship dynamics
trauma history when relevant
communication and comfort
What if my desire has disappeared?
Desire does not disappear, it goes quiet when the body is overwhelmed, exhausted, resentful, shut down, or not feeling emotionally safe. Therapy focuses on helping the nervous system shift from survival mode to safety, which often allows desire to return naturally instead of forcing it.
What kinds of sexual concerns do you help with?
Sex therapy can support concerns such as:
low desire or "I love them but do not want to have sex"
never having had sex
difficulty with arousal or orgasm
painful intercourse
anxiety about sex or intimacy
sex after trauma
sexual shutdown or avoidance
shame, guilt, or confusion about sex
changes in desire after childbirth, stress, illness, or medication
Sex therapy is not about performing or fixing. It is about helping your body feel safer, resolving pressure and fear, and reconnecting with comfort, pleasure, and choice.
Is sex therapy only for couples?
No. Sex therapy is commonly individual therapy, but can also be discussed as a couple. Many people seek sex therapy on their own to explore low desire, performance anxiety, difficulty with arousal or orgasm, shame around sexuality, or confusion about what they want. Others come because they have never had sex and want guidance, support, or healing around this. Whether you are partnered or single, sex therapy focuses on comfort, safety, pleasure, consent, and self-connection at your pace.
Can sex therapy help if I have never had sex?
Yes. Many clients seek therapy for this reason. You may feel anxious, ashamed, overwhelmed, curious, or unsure where to begin. Sex therapy can help you explore your experiences, beliefs, fears, or pain around sexuality without pressure. You set the pace. There is no “timeline” you must follow, and there is nothing wrong with you. The goal is safety, understanding, and choice, not rushing you into an experience you are not ready for.
Is low desire always a "hormone problem"?
No. Hormones can be part of the picture, but desire is also deeply connected to stress, emotional safety, relationship dynamics, exhaustion, resentment, trauma, chronic pain, nervous system activation, and caregiving burnout. When your body is stuck in survival mode, desire often goes quiet. Therapy helps your nervous system shift from pressure and shutdown toward safety and connection, which allows desire to return naturally, without forcing it.
What is sex therapy?
Sex therapy is talk-based psychotherapy that supports concerns related to desire, arousal, sexual pain, sexual anxiety, intimacy, and connection. It focuses on safety, comfort, body responses, emotional factors, and relationship dynamics, not performance. There are no physical exams or sexual activities in therapy.
What if I feel ashamed to talk about this?
Shame is often the biggest barrier to sexual healing. Therapy is a place where you do not have to perform, impress, or hide. You can talk openly about concerns you have never spoken aloud before. The goal is relief, understanding, and reconnection with your own body, not judgment.
